One of the saddest stories I have heard in this realm was that of an year-old man who lived in a nursing home.
He came to see me, asking for something to help him have an erection he had multi-modality treatment for recurrent prostate cancer so options that might help were limited. He told me that there are many women in the nursing home which is typical and that what he really wanted was companionship. Is this real or his perspective?
Do elderly women really judge men in this way? And do they talk about it among themselves?
And he is not the only man to have told me this. It sounds a bit like high school with gossip and innuendo, and, as a consequence, hurt feelings and bruised self-esteem and lots of lonely people who are not part of the A-list. For many, beyond the acute loss of a life partner, lies years of loneliness or at least alone-ness. Adult children and grandchildren often live many miles away, and the opportunities for a hug are few and far between. As human beings, we need physical touch and connectedness to others.
Who said that the older years are golden?
Caregiving and Social Support for Gay and Bisexual Men with Prostate Cancer
They seem pretty grey to me. Not to sound spammy, but there is a cancer survivor dating site called CancerMatch It started in New York City in and now is international. It's entirely free. It's where we don't have to "explain" everything! Skip to main content. Coming out as a gay man is often an isolating experience, and is echoed by hearing that he is diagnosed with cancer. It is hard for a man to come out as a gay or bisexual man, now he is faced with coming out as a cancer survivor…. Many gay men start have experienced their early lives in heterosexual relationships and marriages.
They have tried hard not to be gay, and struggled to get past the fears and risks associated with being out. Now, they are trying hard to not be the person diagnosed with cancer, not the person whose life is once again at risk. Patient needs assurance that his doctor respects him as a gay man.
Simply by asking a man if he enjoys sex with men, women or both, sets a calm and understanding clinical relationship. The patient needs to hear his doctor ask questions to understand the patients concerns about treatment outcomes, such as sexual performance, and will take steps to protect him from all of his practical concerns, such as visitation rights. Doctors should be prepared to respond to gay focused questions as well as clearly communicate a sense of comfort around sexuality. Being Gay is not the same as being short, tall or Russian. Paterson C, et al.
What is the mechanism effect that links social support to coping and psychological outcome within individuals affected by prostate cancer? Real time data collection using mobile technology. Eur J Oncol Nurs. Exploring the relationship between coping, social support and health-related quality of life for prostate cancer survivors: Benedict C, et al. Positive and negative mood in men with advanced prostate cancer undergoing androgen deprivation therapy: Colloca G, Colloca P. J Cancer Educ. Blank TO. Gay men and prostate cancer: J Clin Oncol. Quinn GP, et al.
The effects of attachment and outness on illness adjustment among gay men with prostate cancer.
LGBT Cancer Information
Compton DLR. The Family and Gay Men and Lesbians. Baumle AK, editor. International Handbook on the Demography of Sexuality. Springer; New York: Feinberg L, et al. Insight on the Issues. Valuing the Invaluable: NAC , N. Caregiving in the US, Patterson CJ. Family Relationships of Lesbians and Gay Men. Journal of Marriage and Family.
Oswald RF. Resilience within the family networks of lesbians and gay men: Intentionality and redefinition.
Prostate Cancer in Gay, Bisexual, and Other Men Who Have Sex with Men: A Review
Jan M, et al. The roles of stress and social support in prostate cancer mortality. Scand J Urol. Kroenke CH, et al.
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Social networks, social support, and survival after breast cancer diagnosis. Measuring social support: J Behav Med. Berkman LF. Social Work in Health Care. Social integration, social networks, social support and health. Berkman LF, Kawachi I, editors. Social epidemiology. House JS, et al. Measures and concepts of social support. Syme SCSL, editor. Social support and health. Cohen S.
Social relationships and health. Am Psychol. Voerman B, et al. Determinants of participation in social support groups for prostate cancer patients. Mehnert A, et al. Depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder and health-related quality of life and its association with social support in ambulatory prostate cancer patients. Eur J Cancer Care Engl ; 19 6: Arrington MI.
Theorizing about social support and health communication in a prostate cancer support group. Journal of psychosocial oncology. Man to man and side by side, they cope with prostate cancer: Rosser BRS, et al. A Review. LGBT Health.
Braun V, Clarke V. Using thematic analysis in psychology. Qualitative Research in Psychology. Basics of qualitative research: Los Angeles, CA: Sage Publications, Inc; Social support networks of lesbian, gay, and bisexual adults 60 years of age and older. Social support in the lives of lesbians and gay men at midlife and later. The meaning of friendship for gay men and lesbians in the second half of life. Journal of GLBT family studies. Brennan-Ing M, et al.
Social care networks and older LGBT adults: Challenges for the future. J Homosex. Fredriksen-Goldsen KI, et al. The Impact of the Social Context.